Confessions
by caffeineaddict13
Summary: 9. If he had stuck around, she would have made it work. Plus many other things they never said out loud. Literati. [aka Thirtyfive Reasons]
1. 1

**A/N: **A list that I've been compiling since I first saw them meet.

**Disclaimer: **I don't own anything.

1. Sometimes, she would actually sit down and try to outline everything that had gone wrong with them.

2. It surprised her how little there was.

3. She liked to think that she had chosen Yale because of the list she made…

…but really, she had chosen it because of him.

5. She didn't think anyone realized that she had slept with Dean exactly one year to the day of that kiss at Sookie's wedding.

6. She wished that he had been her first.

7. If he had stuck around, she just might have gotten her wish.

8. If he had stuck around, she would have said it back.

9. If he had stuck around, she would have made it work.

10. Even though she never told him, he made her feel beautiful.

11. She liked to think that she didn't need to wallow because he didn't mean anything…

…but really, she was afraid she would try and find him.

12. Once, Paris had asked her if she wanted to come to California with her over the holidays.

13. She said no.

14. She didn't admit that she hated the west coast.

15. She didn't admit that she hated it because of him.

16. Part of her knew that Logan was exactly the type of guy he would have hated to see her with.

17. She thinks that's partly why she was with him.

18. She never showed anyone, but she made a pro/con list about him, once.

19. She threw it out.

20. Because there were some things she knew couldn't be assessed.

21. She liked to think that said no because she didn't love him…

…but really, she was scared that she was too in love.

22. She had a hickey on her shoulder bone from him, and it never completely healed.

23. She kind of liked it there.

24. Ironically, both their rebounds (or distractions) had been blond.

25. Ironically, hers came second.

26. Ironically, hers came late.

27. Part of the reason she liked Catcher in the Rye so much was that it reminded her of him.

28. She couldn't watch a magician without getting supremely depressed.

29. All the reasons she found to support that he wasn't the right guy for her were stupid.

31. Even Lorelai said so.

32. Part of her wished that she had never met him, because at least then she would still hate Earnest.

33. She liked to think that you couldn't have so much love for someone you hated…

…but the feeling in her heart told her differently.

34. She had fallen, hard.

35. And she sort of wished that he would help her up.


	2. 2

**A/N:** I think you can figure it out.

**Disclaimer: **No.

1. He thought her eyes were the most beautiful things he had ever seen.

2. He still hated Ayn Rand.

3. But mostly because it gave him a reason to talk to her.

4. He would've come back, even if she hadn't promised an eggroll.

5. He liked to think he would've left no matter what…

6. …but really, he wouldn't have if she had told him to stay.

7. He wanted Lorelai to like him.

8. 'Cause maybe then, he'd have a better chance.

9. He always came back.

10. He always did because of her.

11. He always didn't say goodbye.

12. If he did, he knew he wouldn't leave.

13. He blamed himself for everything.

14. Because to him, she was perfect.

15. He liked to think "I love you" was a slip of the tongue…

16. …but really, he had known he would say it.

17. He liked that she called him Dodger.

18. If they had gotten back, he would have studied, simply because she asked him to.

19. They had three anversaries.

20. One was the day of the Dance Marathon.

21. One was the day they first kissed.

22. The other was the Bid-A-Basket Marathon.

23. He actually liked Indian food.

24. He thought her school uniform was cute.

25. He liked to think he was afraid of commitment…

26. …but really, he was afraid that maybe he wasn't.

27. He was scared she'd find some rich boy at Chilton.

28. He was scared that she'd get sick of him.

29. He was scared that she'd see him for what he was.

30. He didn't realize that she already did.

31. He would do anything to make her happy.

32. He knew that he was whipped.

33. Sometimes, he found himself driving halfway back to Stars Hollow.

34. He didn't lie when he said he'd call her.

35. He was just scared he'd say too much.


	3. 3

**A/N: **The other half of things she thought.

**Disclaimer: **Same as ever.

36. She still flinched when Luke came down the stairs from his apartment.

37. Sometimes, she thinks it might be him.

38. Sometimes, she wishes that it was.

39. Sometimes, she wishes he did, too.

40. Funny how she had kissed three brown-eyed boys.

41. Only one of pair of them were, well, _real_.

42. She liked to think she didn't remember his birthday…

43. …but really, she made a wish for him every year.

44. She couldn't look at hot dogs without making her feel sick.

45. When she found out where Dave Rigalski had moved to, she imagined them rooming together.

45. He never told her why his mouth was crooked.

46. She never told him that she liked it.

47. She forced Luke to tell her where he ran off to.

48. She bought plane tickets the very next day.

49. She was (almost) glad she didn't use them.

50. But not quite.

51. She liked to think that Lorelai's opinion came first…

52. …but really, it was tied with his.

53. She makes the joke that he stole her heart along with Howl.

54. It's not really a joke.

55. She looked for him at her graduation.

56. She was almost surprised when she didn't find him there.

57. She finds it funny that he said he couldn't have done it without her.

58. Because she always knew he could.

59. Once, Logan asked her about the writing in most of her books.

60. She just nodded and smiled.

61. She liked to think she never made a Jess Box because he hadn't mattered…

62. …but really, there was too much that reminded her of him.

63. She legitimately liked his Metallica shirt.

64. Part of her wished they had never met.

65. Then, she wouldn't have this hurt.

66. Then, she wouldn't have his kisses.

67. Because after that, nothing else could quite compare.

68. She told herself that Logan made her happy.

69. Really, she had just been imagining him.

70. She didn't think she would ever stop.


	4. 4

**A/N: **Ach. This one isn't that great. Sorry. I'm kind of restless and it's been affecting the way I'm writing. I think I want to get one or two more chapters into this fic, but, like I said, I'm leaving tomorrow and I won't be back for a month. Sorry to those who are reading Between the Lines; I know I sort of promised you another chapter. God. I'm so flaky. Please don't hate me.

**Disclaimer: **Own, me? Nothing, no.

36. He _was_ jealous of Dean.

37. She was a better kisser than anyone he had ever dated.

38. And she didn't even know it.

39. He liked to think that eventually, he'd get over her…

40. …but he realized that he never fully would.

41. He never used to drink coffee.

42. He never used to eat junk food.

43. He never used to fall in love.

44. But there are some things that you just can't hide from.

45. He found it funny that he was the one to run away.

46. He always figured that she would dump him first.

47. He didn't really hate Stars Hollow all that much.

48. False.

49. He didn't really mind it as long as she was around.

50. True.

51. He liked to think he left because he knew it wouldn't work…

52. …but really, he was afraid of how deep he was getting.

53. Sometimes, she would pour his drink at the bar.

54. Or hand him a flyer on the sidewalk.

55. Or check out his books at the library.

56. Sometimes, he even calls out her name.

57. He took night classes for a while.

58. Because he thought that's what she would have wanted.

59. He didn't really like cones all that much.

60. She looked trustworthy.

61. He knew it, even then.

62. He liked to think he ask her to run away with him because he loved her…

63. …but really, he didn't know how to get her to say it back.

64. She was the best teacher he could ever ask for.

65. And he didn't just mean for school.

66. He liked that she liked his crazy hair.

67. Honestly, he didn't wish her a happy birthday because he wanted to come off as sweet.

68. He did it because he really wanted her to have one.

69. Occasionally, he wishes that she would just leave him alone.

70. But then he takes it back.


	5. 5

**A/N: **Yup, home for the weekend. Just posting this. I know it's not that good. Sorry. I hope it quenches whatever thirst you may have had. R&R.

**Disclaimer: **Same as always.

1. Sometimes, they regret that it took so long.

2. But then they remember that good things take time.

3. They liked to think that no matter what, they would always be together…

4. …but really, they were focusing on the now.

5. And, for them, that was enough.

6. He still argues with her.

7. He still teases her.

8. He still hates her.

9. She thinks it's kind of cute.

10. Their book collection is bigger than any library there is.

11. Even the one at Yale.

12. (Or at least the local one.)

13. They like to think that it was chance that made them turn out this way…

14. …but really, they know it was their choice.

15. Now, they _are _a really sweet old agoraphobic couple.

16. Minus the old part.

17. He says that she is the most perfect person he has and will ever meet.

18. She tells him that's not possible.

19. Because he hasn't met himself.

20. They plan to take a trip.

21. They plan to go to Europe.

22. They plan to go together.

23. This time, he won't run away.

24. They like to think that she's the good one…

25. …but really, they knew that she's not.

26. She made him promise to tell her everything.

27. He didn't mind it anymore.

28. They lived off of take out and candy.

29. He knew how she took her coffee.

30. She knew that he'd never forget.

31. He knew that she wouldn't, either.

32. They liked to think that Lorelai was happy because Rory was…

33. …but really, she was happy that Jess was the reason why.

34. He figured out that she was a puzzle.

35. She figured out that he was the piece.


End file.
